Me in 2013

It's been a little while, yes? Well, I am now prompted to post once again for the end of 2013. A sort of digital time capsule, if you will. ;) Here is everything about me right now--

Heidi Caroline
Age:16

School stats:
Grade:Junior
Current favorite colleges: 1)Carnegie Mellon 2)Lipscomb University 3)Belhaven University 4) University of Chicago 5)Taylor/Andersen Universities
Grade Average: 3.97
Favorite Subject: English, Physics, Geometry
Least Favorite: Chemistry
Favorite team: University of Louisville
Team I play on: Bluegrass Equestrian Team
Best friend at school: Kenzi, Korie
Backpack: Blue, LLBean
Favorite school outfit: Norwegian sweater, boots
My next goal: Get into CM, take SAT, get permit

Barn stats:
Favorite horse: Yank (duh)
Most impressive feat so far: Jumping 3ft on Echo
Most fun horse to ride: Yank, Echo, probably
Most challenging horse: Jemma, Yankee, Yank
Proudest moment: Winning 1st at State, Champion at KHJA, Clara winning Champion at York
Last piece of equipment I bought: Leather halter
Current boot brand: Ariat Heritage RT (best. boots. ever.)
Average barn time/week: 14 hrs?
Next goal: Show Yank at KHJA

Theatre stats:
Last play: A Christmas Carol
Favorite role: Beth 2012
Role I'm most proud of: Beth 2011, Maxine, Kate at BJ
Most fun role: Mrs. Crachit, Annie chorus
Hardest role: Kate Edwards
Acting role model: Martin Freeman, Samantha Barks, Gayle King (I<3U;)
Go-to audition song: Anything Can Happen, Everlasting
Next goal: get into GSA, Performance Troupe



Light book when I want to get away: Chestnut Hill
Book that instantly engrosses me: The Battle for Skandia, The Titan's Curse, The Sorceror's Stone
Book when I want to be pulled in: Percy Jackson series, Ranger's Apprentice series
New series from 2013: Keepers of the Lost Cities, The Thirteenth Reality, The Heroes of Olympus
Book I'm looking forward to come out in 2014: The Blood of Olympus
Movie I will actually sit through: The Hobbit
Movie I want to see next: Frozen
Movie I'm waiting to come out in 2014: Into the Woods, The Hobbit
Book I will one day write: Vertigo (AT)

What if?

What if I sang like Brooklyn Shuck?
What if I'd taken dance in elementary school?

Would my life be different?

What if I'd never stepped into the barn at Windhover?
What if I'd never jumped a horse?
What if Miss Sara wasn't my (amazing) teacher?
What if I were still scared?

What would I look like?

What if I'd never had Ms. Avera in fourth grade?
What if I never wrote a poem?
What if I were still a freshman?

How different would I be?

What if I were never in youth choir?
What if I didn't meet Calla at AWANA?
What if Clara were someone else's sister?

Who would I talk to now?

What if I'd refused to go to that first audition?
What if I never went to that play?
What if I never met Graham Pilotte?

Where would I be?

What if I memorized verses with as much zest as I memorize Shakespeare?
What if I really got up early to read my Bible for more than twenty minutes?
What if I wondered what Jesus would do every second of my life?

Would my life be different?

I can't answer every question, but I know that I am about to find out about those.

Much love,

Heidi

Of rejection, dejection, and everything in between

First know, fair readers, that this should have been posted a week and a half ago. But so should a lot of things have been.

On Friday, March 15, I auditioned for Kentucky's Governor's School for the Arts in Music Theatre and Drama.

On Sunday, April 14, I opened my rejection letter from the KYGSA administrators.

Did it sting? Yes.

Did I cry? No.

Did I avoid telling my sisters? Yes.

Did I immediately throw the letter away and then pull it out of the trash ten minutes later? Maybe. :)

Thing is, rejection hurts. It always has, and it always will. It was the first punishment of Adam and Eve- rejection from God's presence and God's garden and God's plan for them.

It was the punishment of the Israelites in the desert- rejection from the Promised Land.

It was Jesus' greatest injury on the cross- rejection by His beloved Father.

It's the reason girls are so worried about their weight, their clothes, their speech, their cover photo, their image. The fear of rejection.

It's the reason guys act so macho until you get to know them. Fear of rejection.

Here's the deal: rejection is actually a big part of most of our lives.

Here's the truth: It doesn't matter one bit!

Leviticus 26:11

I will place My residence among you, and I will not reject you.

Romans 12:2

Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.

God loves us no matter what the world thinks of us. And He does not want us to give up!

So even though I did not get into the program I have dreamed about since seventh grade, I can't give up now. Look at how much I've poured into my acting career. Look at how much God has poured into us. He didn't just forgive us, He adopted us! That's a big deal!

As I was walking out to give the horse hay seconds after reading my rejection letter, I was thinking all sorts of thoughts about how I wasn't good enough for them, and how I must not be as good as I think I am (which really is not saying much; I have been known to be a bit vain in the secret courts of my heart) when all of a sudden a thought popped into my head. I'm not kidding- something completely new,fully formed, and practically spoken to me.

I thought, "I can reject myself and give up, or I can hone my skills and prepare for next year." Because, I thought next, I am my own worst enemy, and I am more critical of myself than I should be.

Please don't take this as vanity that I am such a great actor, or that I have so much self confidence, or even that I always hear when God talks to me, because it isn't that at all. I just wanted to share something that has been on my mind and that I my self really need to remember. In the words of Pastor Greg:

"What society puts out, God puts in. What the world writes off, God picks up."

Blogging through the alphabet- A

Hello friends!

 I have decided to attempt a series, and the one I have chosen is Blogging Through the Alphabet. Ta-daaa!

A is for...

America.

Being American is entirely different from being a citizen of almost any other country for three (main) reasons:

*note- I will take a fairly Republican view in this post for the sake of my Republican friends. you can ask me later if you want.

1. Freedom

This is basically the reason America was established in 1776- freedom, liberty, and justice for all. Today, freedom often means the absence of control- of boundaries- of oppression- of slavery. This sounds all well and good- until the implications sink in. Freedom of this kind carries a huge responsibility...do we all want to be solely responsible for ourselves with no guidance or perimeter whatsoever? No! The problem with the modern interpretation of freedom is that it leaves no room for moral considerations, adopting instead a "I live for myself" attitude which is extremely dangerous to others and to self. This contemporary definition of freedom is very different from the noble ideas which birthed our country. Then, it was freedom from oppression, freedom to rule ourselves, and most importantly, freedom to follow God's laws.

1 Peter 2:16

Act as free men, and do not use your freedom as a covering for evil, but use it as bondslaves of God.

Galatians 5:13

For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.

God's law clearly states that man's "freedom" can be perilous, and I believe the founders of our country recognized that fully. Our forefathers made provisions for man's freedom of speech, freedom of living, freedom of most choices, yet left boundaries in place to prevent us harming ourselves or one another. Though prohibiting drugs may seem like a violation of freedom, by God's definition this is freedom: freedom to follow God's laws uninhibitedly. 

However, it makes me very sad to see this freedom encroached on in recent years. Laws which attribute the care of widows and orphans to the State, not the church. Abortion legalized. And we have no say. Regardless of our policy of...

2. Democracy

The ability to rule ourselves. This is what the revolutionaries fought for 200 years ago- to slip from under the thumb of a faraway king and make our own decisions, as a country. This most definitely sets us apart from many other nations around the world, which are ruled, not governed, by dictators and kings. We, however, have the chance to vote and make a difference (*note- problems with the voting system- email)  

3. Founded on Christian principles

This is the biggie. Why is "under God" in our pledge? Why did the original laws of the country mirror the ten commandments? Why is there a prayer at the inauguration? Because America was founded of Christian principles. Why, then, are children compulsorily taught the opposite of God's word in schools? Why are teachers not allowed to pray? Why can home churches be "zoned" away?

Because America has fallen. Hard. Along with the rest of Creation. We need God to come in and rule our people once more. The corruption and hardship will cease when Jesus returns. I fear lately that this is the only hope for our freedom. But I know that God is in the room, and God is in control, and God will bring us home.

This is what it means to be an American.

Jared Anderson – Hear Us From Heaven

I love BJU

I love college. I love almost all of it. I admit I'm not crazy about coffee or 2-o'clockers. But you really can't beat Catchphrase at 10:00p or Stagecraft at 2:00. And what, pray tell, has inspired these reveries? Why, my recent trip to BJU in South Carolina. And yes, I had a blast.

First of all, the weather was gorgeous! If you're sick of cold, visit SC. Nothing can possible top 70º in February.

Second of all, the campus was wonderful. Lots of trees. You're not allowed to walk on the grass (not that I would) so that's pretty too. The buildings are all pale brick with lots of shiny glass (always a plus) and there is a separate Fine Arts building and no less than four auditoriums, one DDP size and two as big as or bigger than the Whitney (sorry, dear Bomhard, but I'm in love)

This is Rodeheaver. It's the Whitney sized one. It has balcony seating, three separate lifts (or at least that's how many I counted) and a green room as big as my kitchen and dining room. Plus an enormstrous prop room, wig room, costume shop, and makeup room with which I became intimately acquainted. I have never seen so many broadswords and rapiers in one place. Or as lifelike a moose head (that one was a set piece).

Speaking of set pieces, did I mention there's a film company? Yes, on campus. I stood in the middle of  a room set of a movie I've seen that was set in the 30s. It has a greenscreen, soundstage, sound room, editing lab, and animation department. I kid you not.

via google images

This brings me to my favorite part- the people. Nearly everyone at BJU looked happy. Students and faculty would greet me the visitor on the sidewalk, hold the door open automatically, and apologize for gently bringing their backpack in contact with my shoulder in a crowded hallway. The teachers shared the Valentine's candy they brought for their class, insisted I sit up front with the other students, and even gave me handouts and taught me their theatre games.

Will I be attending BJU in three years? I'm not sure. Some things I wasn't as comfortable with, but on the whole the good outweighed the bad. (PS: Their Creative Writing program was highly recommended to me by a girl named Erin. You know who you are:)

So, don't be surprised if you spot me sporting a Bruins shirt in the near future. :)